merry christmas

i hope everyone had a merry christmas! i think the girls did! you know, each year the holidays seem to get a little more stressful, but more fun too. the kids make it great. alan and i were talking the other day and said that it would be boring if it were just us exchanging gifts in the morning. but watching the kids get all excited, and tearing into presents....that's what's so fun. and the older they get the better it gets. the best was this morning...i thought that it would be nice to pray before we started opening presents and thank God for all he has blessed us with, but before i could finish kylee had already begun to pray. she thanked jesus for all our presents and for sending his son. amazing! so simple, so truthful, so real! thank you sweetie for your strong, sweet spirit! and thank you all for all your prayers and support (and wonderful gifts....you are too much) , we feel them! we love you all. merry christmas!please mom, don't kill me for putting in this picture below, but i thought it was too cute not too!

yuck day

how could i not smile at these two cute faces. after a very sad day, these two beautiful girls have made it bearable. some of you already know, but for those who do not, we learned yesterday that we've lost the baby. i can't believe that i am writing right now...i guess i am just processing through some of this without actually talking to people. i'm not quite ready to do that...please, i hope everyone understands. but i must tell you that i do appreciate (so much) your thoughts, prayers, support and willingness to help out. it means the world to me. i just ask you for time. i've never really had to grieve in this way before....except for losing my dog, but that is in itself different.

ya know, i have thought before, that if something like this did ever happen to me, how would i feel? i never thought i would feel the way i do, that is for sure. i thought i would be more detached from the situation,when in fact it is quite the opposite. whether i was eleven weeks pregnant or thirty, this baby was a part of me, a part of this family and it is a deep loss. ever since i've found out i have not looked down at my belly, but up....up to jesus, because that's where he/she is. and that brings joyful tears to my eyes.

some of you may be wondering, "why the heck is she writing this on a blog site?" i'm not exactly sure either, but it is giving me a chance to share with the people who have been concerned what is going on in my head without actually talking about it. i love you all dearly, and again i am so grateful for you love and support. thank you so much.

awoken!

per donna's request, i have awoken from a deep sleep (in the blogging sense), but only for a short time i'm sure. do you see this picture? life has been a little like this....a crazy blur. between illness, teething, lack of naps (the kids), fit throwing and just being pregnant...do i have to say more? needless to say, i have taken a blogging break. i really don't mean to sound so glum, things are not bad, i think it's just a seasonal test!

kylee is getting excited for christmas, but i think she is enjoying more of the goodies that come with the holiday season....i.e. chex mix, chocolate covered pretzels, christmas cookies, and don't forget the fudge (my personal favorite.) although, i have to say, so far with this pregnancy i have been thoroughly enjoying salty foods more than the sweets like i did when i was pregnant with the girls. i'm all about corn dogs and cheddar and sour cream baked lays....whoa! i am going to enjoy myself for the next 12 weeks until i have to take my glucose test. we'll see where it goes from there. enough about my eating habits.

as for this little girl below me....i can't believe that nine months has already gone by. she is definitely a girl on the move. she crawls everywhere, but would probably rather be walking. she pushes her walker toy around very well. did i mention that she is into everything? kylee never minded to much about things on table tops, nor the cupboards...not this girl. everything she sees, she touches, pulls on and puts in her mouth. i think she has tried opening every drawer and cupboard at her level. the poor thing is also getting her front two teeth. her gums are so swollen, it makes me hurt for her. maybe we'll have two teeth cut through for Christmas?

okay, i promise to be little better at posting. maybe i need to get on my cousin and his wifes case...they haven't posted since august! i would like to see some new pictures of zak and see whats new in there world.;)

snot bubbles

my kids are sick and what do i do....yep, i get out the camera and take pictures of snot-bubbles! i just can't resist...especially now that my camera is finally back. but check out this action..... the bubble that gets

bigger..............

and bigger...........
what can i say, this was simply amazing. i have never seen anything like it. it didn't pop until she sneezed. it is looking like she has what kylee had (bronchitis), but with head congestion as well. i really do hate it when the kids get sick. i feel helpless, especially with alaina because she can't tell me what is bothering her....i just have to guess. hopefully this will all end soon.